said by Halle this morning when she wasted enough time I couldn't do her hair for school and she had to settle for a ponytail she did herself:

"It's not fair!

Now I'm going to go to school

looking like a FREAK!"

more Carsonisms

Carson: "Mom, when am I going to grow up? It's taking forever!"

------------

Carson: "Me and Wyatt are going to be on T.V. when we grow up."
Me: "Really? How?"
Carson: "Wyatt's going to be a football guy coach and you know that race car show Daddy watches [Nascar]? Well, I'm going to drive the race car on there."

------------

Carson: "Mom, you're pretty."
Me: "Thank you, Carson."
Carson: "I mean, your kind of pretty and your also kind of ugly, but you're more pretty than ugly."
Me: [SIGH.] "Thanks, Bud."

Won't you be my valentine?, Part 1

Every morning on V-Day, I make a sinful, scrumptious breakfast. Last year it was chocolate crepes. This year, it was...

Strawberry French Toast made with Chunky Cinnamon Bread!

The kids also got a small bag of treats,
like stickers, red & pink jelly bellies, socks, chocolate chapstick, etc.

I can't talk V-Day without sharing a couple new pictures of my

most recent valentine, Ms. Ruby Roo.

She is getting big! She's 2 1/2 pounds and

full of feistiness! (word?)

Won't you be my valentine?, Part 2

The week leading up to Valentine's, Brett had been in Phoenix for a full week, so needless to say we were both very much looking forward to our special datenight. We always celebrate V-Day early, since we hate the crowds on the actual day and our first date was actually on Feb. 5th (eleven years ago!). It was a great opportunity for us to use the Market Street Grill giftcard Santa had left in my Christmas stocking, and perfect timing, too since they were having their Crab Festival (which tasted heavenly, BTW).

-

While we waited for our meal, I had Brett open his gift. Now, typically we don't exchange V-Day gifts because both of us would prefer a really nice datenight instead, but this year I realized there was something my sweet husband could honestly use after I'd been forced to drive the truck the entire time he was in Arizona. That week happened to have been a cold one, with several chilly snowstorms hitting the Wasatch Front. I could now fully appreciate how lousy it has been for him to hop into a FREEZING truck every morning - one that seems to require driving 4-5 miles before the air hits a notch above arctic!

-

Here's his gift (first, the "oh-so-crafty

and oh-so-funny-if-I-do-say-so-myself card"):

Ooooooooh! A remote-start kit and key!

Thanks for revving my engine babe - I love you.

a lunchtime poem to whet your appetite...

'Twas twelve o'clock noon and my tummy was growling,

So barefoot I went to the kitchen a'prowling.

Steamed veggies served hot was my appetite's wish,

Until the skin on my heel felt a yucky, cool SQUISH!

. . .

I quickly looked down, for what could it have been?

But identifying the substance only ruined my zen!

I screamed, like falling down a bottomless pit,

Oh yes, dear reader, it was Ruby's $#%@!

I robbed a bank and now I'm on the lam

.

Yes, I am a fugitive.

.

I robbed a bank.

.

Or rather, I stole from my credit union.

.

.

In my speedy get-away minivan, I floored it, speeding past the bewildered teller who was still in shock that I would have the guts to steal...

.

.

.

...this.

.

.

Is there anything more embarrassing than having to return to your credit union the next day and admit you forgot to put the container back in the tube before leaving, not realizing you still have it in the car until you're pulling into the garage at home and see it sitting on the passenger seat?

.

Fortunately for me, the coppers never found me and I was able to repent of my sinful ways before my soul was completely lost and hopeless.

When I look in the mirror, I almost see THIS reflection staring back at me:

or at least that's what my kids apparently see when they look at me. There are outings with the children where I feel nothing more than a glorified pack mule.

"Here, Mom, hold my jacket."

"Here, Mom, hold my drink."

"Here, Mom, take my trash."

"Here, Mom, hold my [chewed] gum."

Sometimes I wonder if the only way I'll be able to get their attention is if I kick up my hind legs and bray.

Movies I wish I owned...

Strictly Ballroom



Good News



The King and I



Oklahoma - the Hugh Jackman version



The Money Pit



The Burbs



Scarlett, Sequel to Gone with the Wind



Gone With the Wind on DVD


Funny Farm





In the Good Ol' Summertime


The Philadelphia Story


Notorious

She's Here!

Sweet Ruby finally joined her new family yesterday and we simply could not be more thrilled! She's sweet, soft, and ready to play! This little girl and I are gonna get along just fine!!!

Brett had sprained his ankle Saturday night (more to come on that later) and I was a little nervous to drive the 45 minutes home by myself with the puppy, so I asked one of my beautiful young women to come with me and help out. I'm so glad I had Kylie there to keep Ruby happy and calm the whole way home!

When we pulled onto our street, I had to stop the car in the middle of the road because my children, and several of the neighborhood children, swarmed the car to get a first-glimpse of the new dog - it was like Ruby had her own paparazzi!

Wyatt enjoyed showing her off to his best buddy, Maryn

Ruby was so excited and seemed to take to all of us right away - she was running and playing, licking our fingers and wagging her adorable tail! She's already put two-and-two together that I'm "mom" and so far am her favorite snuggling buddy.

Our cute neighbor, Quinn, was so precious with the dog - I loved watching her face light up and smile whenever Ruby walked over to her

The kids were beside themselves with giddiness! (is that a word?)

Ruby's stats:

Birth Date: Dec. 7, 2010

(Pearl Harbor Day - easy to remember.

Maybe we should have named her Pearl?)

Weight: 1 1/4 lbs.

Height: 7 1/2" (head to foot)

Length: 9 3/4" (head to tail)

An E-Diary of Pear-Shaped Proportions!

http://bottomheavyconfessions.blogspot.com/

(no invitation required...)