Last night someone said something that really made me think. It made me realize that it's very possible I spend more time on my calling than is healthy. She and I had an "email conversation "about it and this is what I told her:
Lately I feel like my calling can be compared to some type of aggressive flower, like Tall Phlox… It’s beautiful and is a wonderful addition to your garden. It enhances your garden (your life) and brings you great joy. However, if you’re not careful, it can become excessive and invasively spread, taking over all the other beautiful plants in your garden. Does that make sense? I love my calling. I love, love, LOVE the women I serve with. I love the girls. I appreciate how my own testimony has re-emerged stronger and better. However, I am finding it extremely difficult to find the fine line between serving with all I can and yet not letting it overrun my life. It’s a balance I just cannot seem to master. There is a power struggle: trying to have “a life”, and yet trying to do all I can to feel as though I’m successfully contributing in my calling. I’m a bit at a loss…when I think about what I have to do, and think about cutting back on it, all my mind can focus on is all the possible consequences of not doing it or getting it done.
How do others serve so phenomenally in their challenging church callings and yet maintain a healthy balance? What's the secret???
Lately I feel like my calling can be compared to some type of aggressive flower, like Tall Phlox… It’s beautiful and is a wonderful addition to your garden. It enhances your garden (your life) and brings you great joy. However, if you’re not careful, it can become excessive and invasively spread, taking over all the other beautiful plants in your garden. Does that make sense? I love my calling. I love, love, LOVE the women I serve with. I love the girls. I appreciate how my own testimony has re-emerged stronger and better. However, I am finding it extremely difficult to find the fine line between serving with all I can and yet not letting it overrun my life. It’s a balance I just cannot seem to master. There is a power struggle: trying to have “a life”, and yet trying to do all I can to feel as though I’m successfully contributing in my calling. I’m a bit at a loss…when I think about what I have to do, and think about cutting back on it, all my mind can focus on is all the possible consequences of not doing it or getting it done.
How do others serve so phenomenally in their challenging church callings and yet maintain a healthy balance? What's the secret???
4 comments:
For me, it was learning that it's okay to say "no" sometimes. I read in an Ensign article (sorry, I can't remember when exactly) that said that even Christ himself had to have a break from the multitudes. He had to say no to those pressing in around him. That really hit me.
I felt like I was trying to be superwoman with my calling, my home, my family, me, and I was so overwhelmed. I even called my mom one night and told her I didn't want to do it anymore. I didn't want to be a mom, or a wife, or in the church. I just wanted to be little again and have her take care of everything.
When I finally learned to say no (and that first time was HARD), I started to feel so much better. It was a slow process, and sometimes I still take on more than I can/should handle. Get the book by Emily Watts (if you don't have it already) called "Being the Mom." She has some great advice in there on this very subject. Learning when to let go, and learning when it's okay to go that second mile. :)
Remember that you have Counselors to help you and you can delegate and have them be in charge of things, activities etc...It' ok sometimes to say no. You'll be blessed for putting so much into your calling (and you have a very important and BUSY one!) but I agree sometimes we let them take over because we want to do a good job. I know you'll find a good balance! LOVE YOU!
Such great advice, even just encouragement. Thank you. And as a side-note I do have to share that my counselors and advisors are literally THE. BEST. There simply aren't better women to work with! I'm so grateful for them and they all do a ton of work as well--I'm afraid sometimes I delegate too much. But yeah, even with that, I'm feeling like it shouldn't take up as much time as it is. What do I do?
I'm a little behind in reading your blog, love the FHE back to school, super cute. So, feeling like your calling takes up too much time is certainly an easy trap. I would say trying to distinguish the difference between essential components of the YW program and "fluff". I think it's pretty easy (especially in Utah) to get lost in the details of the program and forget the main purpose, helping these girls draw closer to Christ. Does the handbook say anything about a handout with every lesson, well-crafted activities every week, etc? It's easy to do too much. You are doing a great job, Hope keep up the good work. Maybe consider getting the YW Pres manual out and looking at where your can cut back.
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